Self Consciousness - Is A Hurdle You Can Overcome

We all know what it is like to fall under the spell of self consciousness. To feel that we are the only person under scrutiny - that we are the centre of attention. That everybody is looking at us. We are very conscious of self - our self. And we don't like it.

And things go wrong . . .

We are in the middle of doing something and one thing after another seems to be happening. And things seem to be getting out of control. And they all seem to have a mind of their own. And we seem to be caught up in the middle of it all. Our self consciousness is coming to the fore.

We are trying to be cool. Trying to shrug things off - was it really me? But we are having difficulties. We are being self conscious - and everyone seems to be aware.

A little off key?

We have all done things in the past that were just a little off key. But did they really matter. Did other people think the worse of us for so doing? Are we not all trying in life to do the right thing to get through life in the best way possible.

And when we try we don't always succeed. Try, try and try again is the oft said motto. Yet it does work. It does help to learn something from the previous tries though, does it not?

A case of survival?

We are all trying to survive in life. We are all trying to thrive in life. We are all trying to get there, though at times we don't know where the 'there' is. So we are all in the same boat really. Some are paddling, others are rowing, others are using an engine. Some have radar, some have sat nav. Others have ancient maps. And others have advice and suggestion. Yet others seem to be doing things on their own - but getting by.

The embarassment

It can be the embarassment that gets to you. You are so much thinking about what other people might think that you lose track. Your self consciousness can seem to take over.

The duck and the swan story . . .

We should remember the duck and the swan. How growing up the swan, and being surrounded by ducks, tried to be a duck. Then, getting older and finding other swans, it realized that it was really a swan, and could be proud and grateful to just be what nature intended.

And us?

Growing up thinking you should be something, and yet you are really something else. Recognizing that you are fine as you are. Understanding that you are a special human being in your own right. You have a place in life and a special one at that. Your place.

Why are we trying to be something else when we can grow to be the real us? Are we trying to prove something? If so what?

We can grow, we can develop, we can warm to our task. Of being us. We can feel proud. Proud of being us. There is no one around like us. There is no one quite like us. For that we should feel proud. We should feel glad.

Our individuality

We should rejoice in our own individuality. And don't worry about your self consciousness.

• It matters not if we are clumsy every now and again - who is not?
• It matters little if we get embarassed when speaking in public or too a group of people - who does not feel it, and even the 'pros'?
• It matters not if we get embarassed every now and again - who does not?
• It matters little if we drop our pen every five minutes - think of all the exercise we get picking it up
• It matters to a few people what we are and what we do - the special people to us
• It does not matter to most people how we are or what we do - they have their own life to live and that is sufficient to keep them busy (and out of our hair)
• It can matter to us but we just have to be relaxed about it - conscious of being us and the wonder of that

Whether we are a duck or a swan, what matters is what we do about being ourselves. What and how we do things ourselves. How we react to live. Whether we are tackling life or life is just tackling us. Whether it is two way thing or just one way - the choice is ours.

But are they really looking?

Are they really looking at us anyway? Most of the time, no.. Most of the time other people are so caught up in themselves and their affairs that they have very little time, if any, to grant us an audience. Very little time at all to worry about what we may be doing, how well, and how consciously.

If we realized that most people, most of the time, have their own concerns, their own worries, and have little time to expend on wondering how we are getting on - then we would be surprised. They have little time for their own activities and little to spare to criticize us.

And so we might feel a lot easier about this whole self consciousness phenomenon.

Life is an act . . .

Life is an act and we love to play. Some of us love the attention. Others like ourselves can grow to get used to the play of life.

But we can remember

Self consciousness shows that we are alive. Shows that we really care. Shows us (and others) that things actually do mean something to us.

Time is not just passing by but that its movement and ours within that does mean something. We can accept ourselves for the person we are. We can take pride in that. We want to make a difference. We can make a difference.

Overcoming

We do care. Life is important. We want to play our part. And we can.

We can overcome our self consciousness if we see that as a hurdle. We can live with ourselves if it means putting our name on the line. Wanting to be counted we will meet challenges. We will meet hurdles.

But we can get through. We will not just manage, but we can stride forward into the life that is ours.

Our claim

We can claim our rightful place in life. We can make our valuable and individual contribution. We can sit back at night and feel proud of the things we have achieved.

We can sit back and feel that glow of satisfaction at the progress that we have made. Self consciousness may or may not be a (small) part of our life - but if we look around who really seems immune? And we can look forward with confidence to the future - our future.